Support for you during the holidays

The festive season can be a really tricky time for single parents. Whether this is your first Christmas as a single parent or not, you deserve support.

Even though it might seem like it, there is no official “how to do Christmas” and everyone has their own traditions. Thinking about this, maybe this year you can create some traditions of your own.

There are some things you can do at Christmas to keep in the spirit without breaking the bank. Have a look at our single parent guide to winter and Christmas.

There are some useful links below for coping with bereavement and separation, as well as more general emotional support during the festive period. We also have some tips for those who are living with or caring for someone with a disability around Christmas.

Emotional support

Some parents have told us that they feel lonely and miss their children during the time that they’re with other family. Sometimes this can mean that they’re not able to relax and enjoy time to themselves.

This is understandable, especially if this is the first Christmas you’ve been separated.

  • You might want to enjoy the time at home watching a film, relaxing in the bath, or meeting up with friends to distract yourself
  • You might want to get dressed up for Christmas, or you might prefer to have a relaxed pyjama day
  • You might want to find new people to talk to or spend time with, restart an old hobby, or learn something new. There are websites such as  meetup.com  where you can search for groups in your area with similar interests
  • You can also chat online with other parents on our Forum, or use chat rooms such as  Netmums  or  Mumsnet
  • If you can’t be with the people you would like to be with this Christmas you might want to have a chat, drink, quiz or some fun with them via video chat
  • We have some tips here for dealing with anxiety and stress
  • Here are some tips for coping with generally low mood, anxiety and stress
  • We have some tips on connecting with others, which you can use during the holiday season
  • Here are some tips for improving your self-esteem and confidence, which can be useful if you’re feeling down around the Christmas period or if you know you’re going to be celebrating by yourself this year

Different people find different things work best for them and their family – there is no one size fits all solution and you’re the expert of yourself. Most importantly, try to relax and enjoy your time.

Disability at Christmas

If you have, or are caring for someone with a disability, Christmas and winter can be an especially tricky time of year. Here are some resources to help you financially and mentally.

Bereavement at Christmas

Coping with bereavement at Christmas can be extremely difficult, especially as a single parent with so many things to juggle.

Whether this is your first Christmas without a loved one or not, you might find that you have more intense emotions around this time of year. That’s okay. Remember that grief comes in many different forms and is different for everyone.

It can be really difficult to open up, but it’s important to talk to someone you trust about how you feel, as it can help to take the weight off of your shoulders.

Here are some resources you might find useful.

It can be really hard to talk about grief during the festive period. You might feel like you’re ruining the Christmas spirit – but this isn’t the case.

Just take a moment to imagine how you would react if one of your friends or loved ones came to you to tell you about their grief.

Most likely, you would make time to listen to them and offer them kindness and love. Now apply that logic to yourself, and to how others might care for you. Try and see yourself through the eyes of someone who cares for you in these moments of self-doubt.

Remember to be kind to yourself. If you feel like you can’t celebrate Christmas the same way as you used to, that’s okay. Whether you need to remove yourself from it all or just part of it, either way it’s okay.

Trying to do one or two small things for yourself around the festive period is enough. Whether it’s taking a walk or a bath, having a friend visit or phone you, or simply getting dressed.

Separation at Christmas

Separation from a partner is tough at any time of year, and Christmas is no exception.

If you have recently separated from a partner and are about to have your first Christmas as a single parent, you are not alone. Below are some links to help you with separating

Regardless of the time of year, the most important thing when separating from a partner is that you and your children are safe. Below are some resources for keeping yourself and your children safe through your separation from your partner.

If you are unsure about the benefits you might be entitled to now that you are separated, you can call our helpline. We can run a free check for you and talk you through your options going forward. Free phone 0808 801 0323 to get in touch with an advisor.